I can’t empathize with an arrogant person, but I can empathize with an insecure person. Therefore I cannot stand arrogant people
THAT BEING SAID.
There is a threshold of confidence that’s gotta be met before I find someone attractive enough to go out with. Also if we look at empirical data my dating track record has been with strictly outspoken / eloquent / relatively loud girls so I’ll take confidence every day
You just gotta be self aware I think, more so than modest. I just find confidence unbelievably attractive.
Well, I don't see confidence and modesty as opposites. I think confidence is cool, I like it when someone has faith in their abilities and know that if they do try, they will have a good chance of succeeding.
Modesty is cool too, I enjoy it when people don't showboat all their skills, it makes it even better when they do display their skills, you kinda don't expect it.
What I do find unattractive is misplaced arrogance and constant repetition of "I'm going to fail" or something similar when their abilities would prove otherwise.
ik you don't want this but I'm gonna take the easy answer and say a balance of both. I don't particularly find the extremes of either more annoying than the other and neither are really enticing by themself to me.
very good question. i definitely find confidence more attractive and while arrogance is definitely annoying, rampant insecurity is too. i get that it can't be helped, i used to be very insecure. but i also had to deal with it in a relationship and it's very frustrating. also i think insecurity is far more common than arrogance is so since you have less extremes with confidence that wins over modesty.
but obviously like you said the balance etc is the safe answer and i think a lot of people practice modesty even while they are naturally self-confident
Do you find modesty or confidence a more attractive quality in people?
I think the safe answer would be like "blah blah, there needs to be a balance of both blah" but I actually find that I'm drawn more to modest individuals than confident ones, and that the extreme of confidence (arrogance) is more annoying to me than the extreme of modesty (insecure). What do y'all think?
I'm gonna start a new thing where I ask a deeper question and give my point of view but also ask for other people's opinions and stuff as well! I don't have much more that I want to share personally on this thread, so I'd like to shift the direction a little bit. I don't know what my first question will be yet or how often it's gonna happen (depending on my scheduling and laziness) but stay tuned!!
