i want to shave off all his stubby little curly facial hairs and snort them right off his face do i know you? because if i did i'd give myself amnesia just to have another first date with you
only if you swa-wait aren't you 12
let's mate like the walrus do
shove your staff down my throat gandalf
if i was in a broom closet with you i'd let you watch me shove every single tool up my @ss until i cried
nice jacket, i want to hear you sing of my lustful qualities strictly over vocaroo because who needs the playing of organs when you yea let's just keep this one long distance
i stand in front of the dimly lit doorway - my heart beating with trepidation, my lungs engulfing far less air than usual, and my heart matching the pace of a heavy metal drummer.
i stand in front of the black door. i knock. . what am i going to do? how am i going to say what i want to say to goodbar? how am i supposed to confess my feelings? the deepest, most secret convictions i have hid from everyone, including myself, have been buried within me so deeply that i can't fathom goodbar getting to know even the least of them.
this was a mistake. i need to leave. as i turn and prepare to make a quick bolt, i hear the door open. stammering, i turn around with fear in my heart. it's goodbar. he's been watching.
there's nothing else i can do. no way out of this. no way to escape. i have to tell him. i have to tell him the truth. festering nervously and barely choking out each fractured syllable, i stammer:
