In lack of the everybin, I will be the scapegoat epicmafia needs. This is it. I am a two time silver trophy winner, and I think I have successfully reached the level of epicmafia success that Justin Beiber has reached in real life. There will be no harassment reports here. This is a zone without harassment violations. I am one of epicmafia's finest, and this is my roast
Two dudes are fighting in the middle of the street in NYC. (Typical.) They're playing tug-o-war over a painting (less typical) and while a girl is filming this ridic fight, literally OUT OF NOWHERE Ryan Gosling walks in (REALLY REALLY not typical). He steps into the quarrel and when he spots this altercation, he immediately tries to break it up (HEART OF GOLD!). Ryan drops his shopping bag (NOT MATERIALISTIC!) and throws his GIANT, THROBBING man muscle of an arm against the perpetrator and when he spots Ry Ry's huge guns, he throws his hands up in defeat. By some crazy stroke of luck, Ryan decided to wear a striped and nautical-inspired tank the VERY day his bulging biceps would come in handy. THEREFORE, his tank top basically saved the day. Would the story have played out differently if he was wearing a baggy hoodie? YES. You can't see all that rock hard steel beneath layers of cotton, people. Pure brawn speaks louder than any words you could POSSIBLY say to these angry gentleman, and for THAT, we should all give a nice, HUGE round of applause to Ryan Gosling's tank top. It saved the day AND gave us a nice show of what those bad boys can do.
you're a narcissistic, drug-addled little **** whose mental state has been completely obliterated at the ripe age of 18, further ensuring his failure in life by choosing a useless major and crushing on girls who aren't even honest to you about where they live (probably because they don't ever want you to find them). unable to get any sort of positive reinforcement in life, you resort to feeding off negative attention and crowning yourself some sort of "tell it like it is" anti-hero who is in reality nothing more than a perpetually frustrated, rambling buffoon. at least you have a trophy right? oh wait, it's silver.
